"In the beginning"

Disclaimer

The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Friday, July 13, 2012

Come on down!!!


Could it be that I'm getting cynical?????


 
   Good Day and welcome to a brand new edition of : 
'ASYLUM'
. 
Today's program features another chance to take part in our exciting competition:
 
Hop on a boat
 
And win
 
A FREE HOUSE!
 
We've already given away hundreds of millions of
 dollars and thousands of dream homes, courtesy of our sponsor, 
The Australian Taxpayer.
 
And don't forget, we're now the fastest growing game on the planet.
Anyone can play, provided they
don't already hold a valid Australian Passport, and you only need one word of English: 
'ASYLUM'
 
Prizes include all-expenses-paid accommodation, cash benefits starting at
$800 a week and a chance to earn thousands more begging, mugging and
accosting drivers at traffic lights.
This competition is open to everyone
buy a ticket
to Indonesia 
And catch the first available boat
. 
No application ever refused -
reasonable or unreasonable. 
All you have to do is destroy all your papers
or burn your boat once you enter Australian waters,and remember the magic password 
'ASYLUM' 
A few years ago, 140 members of the Taliban family from Afghanistan were flown Goat Class from Kabul to Indonesia gateway, where agents were on hand to fast-track them to their boat trips to luxury accommodation
They joined tens of thousands of other lucky winners already staying in hotels all over Australia
Our most popular destinations also include the
Baxter reef and the world famous Christmas Island resort 
If you still don't understand the rules, don't forget, there's no need to
 phone a friend or ask the audience
Just apply for legal aid.
 
Hundreds of lawyers, social workers and counsellors are waiting to help.
 
It won't cost
 you a cent. 
It could change your life forever
.
So play today.
 

Iraqi Terrorists, Afghan Dissidents, Albanian Gangsters, Pro-Pinochet
Activists, Anti-Pinochet Activists, Kosovan Drug-Smugglers, Tamil Tigers,
Bogus Bosnians, Rwandan Mass Murderers, Somali Guerrillas...
 
COME ON DOWN! 

Get along to the
Indonesia fishing ports 
Don't stop in Thailand
or Bali 
Go straight to Australia
 
And you are:
 
GUARANTEED
 
to be one of tens of thousands of lucky winners in the easiest game on earth.
 
Everyone's a winner, when they play
 
'ASYLUM'
 

4 comments:

Merle said...

Hi Peter ~~ Good one and similar to what I am going to post on the weekend. We should be sending these to Julia though I doubt she would lose any sleep over them. Take care, Love, Merle.

Joy Des Jardins said...

This is hysterical Peter. Where in the world do find these things? Thanks for the morning chuckle... ~Joy

Cliff said...

Wow, sounds like America.
Our current administration is running TV ads in Arizona in Spanish language only encouraging them to get on the government payroll by applying for food stamps. Even if you're here illegally. (here they're called undocumented Democrats) He has upped our food stamp budget to over $76 Billion. More than doble in 3 and a half years. It's called buying votes and he's the best there's ever been. And he wants everyone to vote whether or not they're citizens or not. The criminals just love him and they should.

Lee said...

And it takes less time than "Six Months in a Leaky Boat!"