"In the beginning"

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The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Advise on Credit Cards.

Could this be political correctness for pussy cats??

Credit Cards.

Be sure & cancel your credit cards before you die.

This is so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service
being what it is today.

A lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February &
March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and then
added late fees & interest on the monthly charge. The balance had
been $0.00, now it's somewhere around $60.00.

A family member placed a call to Citibank:

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you that she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees & charges
still apply."

Family Member: "Maybe you should turn it over to collections."

Citibank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report
her to the credit bureau; maybe both!"

Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Citibank: "Excuse me?"

Family Member: "Did you just get what I was telling you . . . the part
about her being dead?"

Citibank: "Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor"

Supervisor gets on the phone.

Family Member: "I'm calling to tell you, she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees & charges
still apply."

Family Member: "You mean you want to collect from her estate?"

Citibank: (Stammer) "Are you her lawyer?"

Family Member: "No, I'm her great nephew." (Lawyer info given)

Citibank: "Could you fax us a certificate of death?"

Family Member: "Sure." (the fax number is given)

After they get the fax ...

Citibank: "Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what
more I can do to help."

Family Member: "Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just
keep billing her. I don't think she will care."

Citibank: "Well, the late fees & charges do still apply."

Family Member: "Would you like her new billing address?"

Citibank: "That might help."

Family Member: "
Odessa Memorial Cemetery, Highway 129, Plot
Number 69."

Citibank: "Sir, that's a cemetery!"

Family Member: "What do you do with dead people on your planet?"


What fun it is dealing with "customer service"


A local business was looking for office help.


They put a sign in the window saying: HELP WANTED Must
be a good typist and be good with a computer. Successful
applicant must be bilingual.
We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.

A short time later a lovely golden retriever dog trotted up to
the window, saw the sign and went inside. He looked at the
receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked over to the sign,
looked at it, whined and pawed the air.

The receptionist called the office manager.

He was surprised to say the least to see a canine applicant.
However, the dog looked determined, so he led him into the
office.

Inside, the dog jumped up on a chair and stared at the
manager expectantly.

The manager said, "I can't hire you. The sign says you
must be able to type."

The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter and
proceeded to quickly type a perfect business letter.
He took out the page and trotted over to the manager,
gave it to him, then jumped back up on the chair.

The manager was stunned, but told the dog, "That was
fantastic, but I'm sorry. The sign clearly says that
whoever I hire has to be good with a computer."

The dog jumped down again, went to the computer and
proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with various
programs, produced a sample spreadsheet and database,
then presented them to the manager.

The manager was dumbfounded. He said to the dog,
"Hey, I realize that you are a very intelligent applicant
and have fantastic talent, but you're a dog -- no way
could I hire you."

The dog jumped down and went to the sign in the window
and pointed his paw at the words,
"Equal Opportunity Employer."

The exasperated manager said, "Yes, I know what the
sign says. But the sign also says you have to be bilingual."

The dog looked him straight in the eye and said, “Meow.”



14 comments:

Cathy said...

Hi Peter, I just visited Merle and then came to visit you. I love this pic, I think I need to post it with a link back to you.

Miss Cellania said...

That credit card bit is hilarious, but whoever wrote it didn't think about the fact that there should be no "late fees" on a zero balance.

Peter said...

Miss C, the late fees were applied after the annual charge was made, so there was a balance to apply the late fees to.

JunieRose2005 said...

Loved your post today, Peter.

The sunbathing cats are soooo cute!

And both those jokes are funny!
( I can see that credit card thing happening!)


June

Jack K. said...

ROTFLMAO

Both very funny.

bark, meow, and a tweet, tweet, tweet.

lol

Anonymous said...

Great post!
Woof Woof!
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Cool Raggedy one

Anonymous said...

It won't let me post as me so there is no cat picture to go with the woof woof..hahaha
Raggedy

Christina said...

Well, the last post mede me cry, but this one cracked me up laughing. I can totally see that credit card bit happening, with the bureaucracy there is today.

Zinnia said...

That photo and the credit card one are hilarious!

LittleJen said...

good jokes Peter, loved the credit card one.

Jo

Hale McKay said...

"Meow!" - LOL - that was a riot!

I especially enjoyed the bit about the credit card.

Good post, Pete.

Jim said...

The credit card joke is good. Did the dog get the job?
I just now got to read the fireman letter too. That is a tear jerker.
Keep them coming.
..

Lucy said...

Bow Wow -- those were SOOO funny. Loved them.

Katherine said...

Loved those both, thanks for a good laugh.