Stuff you might need to know.

Yes I know we have all seen these before but they still make us smile and I needed
something simple to post, so stop complaining!!

25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP !!!

1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a bunk bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00am is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favourite song in a shopping centre.

6. You watch the ABC.

7. Your friends marry & divorce instead of "hook up" and "break-up."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 20.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those ****** kids
next door won't turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking
"Oh sh*t, what happened?"

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

16. You take weekend naps from noon

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

18. Eating a Kebab at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

19. You go to the Chemist for ibuprofen and antacid, not
condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going
to drink that much again!" -

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. -

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

25. You read and reread this entire list looking desperately for
one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save
your sorry old butt. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends
cause you know they'll enjoy it as much as you did & do the same.

30 Things you need to know.

1. Aftermath - When I had English class
2. Analogy - Life story of an asshole
3. Autopilot - One of the stars of the movie "Airplane"
4. Benign - What an 8-year-old is on next birthday
5. Bombadier - Use grenades to kill Bambi
6. Brouhaha - Giggles from drinking too much beer
7. Budget - What Yoda says when he needs another beer
8. Catch-22 - A bust when playing Blackjack
9. Commercial - What Hershel's mother says when dinner is ready
10. Controvertible - Sedan
11. Donate - The past tense of donut
12. Elixir - What a man does after he kisses down low
13. End all - The letter "L"
14. Ennui - Where tears form
15. Experiment - The hardened wads found under counter tops
16. Feline - Where you wait for hours to pay your registration
17. Forego - What you do after foreplay
18. Hortense - What happened when the hooker was busted
19. Larceny - Posting "The Far Side" cartoons against cartoonist's wishes
20. Miniscule - Kindergarten
21. Mystery - She spelled cheese as "chese"
22. Negligent - Wearing flannel pajamas to bed
23. Oxymoron - The dude who sells Oxy cleaner on those Infomercials
24. Pasteurize - Where your eyebrows are found
25. Piston - Much worse than pistoff
26. Rectum - What happened to the cars in a head-on collision
27. Rhubarb - Ru Paul's sister who dresses up as a man
28. Sparrow - What you have when you spell "boook"
29. Upstart - The letter "U"
30. Voluptuary - Where Victoria's Secret models live.