"In the beginning"


The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Monday, December 07, 2009

Modern Nursery Rhymes.

Just where does the future of Nursery Rhymes lie????

It's Raining, It's Pouring
Oh sh!t, it's Global Warming.

Jack and Jill went into town
To fetch some chips and sweeties.
He can't keep his heart rate down
And she's got diabetes.

Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its @rse
And turned its wool to nylon.

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
Between two chunks of bread.

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy.
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it's black and crispy.

Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too cause he was gay

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
And grabbed her ass
Now two of his teeth are missing.

There are many more instances of "updated" nursery-rhymes some of which even I wouldn't post... wow they must be BAD.
It just goes to prove nothing is sacred anymore though.


Cliff said...

...between to chunks of bread. Now that's funny.

kenju said...

Too funny, Peter! I like these newer versions.

Dave said...

Oh some of THOSE were pretty bad Peter! *LOL*

Jack K. said...

Cool, man, cool. chortle

Ralph said...

Those all gave me a good laugh. Thanks.

Rachel said...

Peter, I can count on you to make me laugh out loud!! These were all funny!!!

ChrisB said...

Peter hope you don't mind me borrowing a couple of these for my blog Thanks

karisma said...

Oh de ja vu! LOL! Yes I went to Chris place first! Love the first one!

Pamela said...

You should host a fun monday and ask everyone to "update" their favorite nursey ryhme.... ha ha

Walker said...

So daddy shot mommy and wrapped her in bread