"In the beginning"

Disclaimer

The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Revenge is sweet.


Oh for the opportunity, and the wit to have done this.
 
Revenge on the telemarketer

The phone rang as we were sitting down to dinner. I answered it and
was greeted with, "Is this William Wagenhoss?"
 
This didn't sound anything like my name, so I asked, "Who is calling?"
The telemarketer said he was with The Rubberband-Powered
Freezer Company or something like that.
 
I asked him if he knew William personally and why was he
was calling this number.
I then said, off to the side, "Get really good pictures of the body
and all the blood."
 
I turned back to the phone and advised the caller that he
had called a murder scene and must stay on the line because we
had already traced this call and he would be receiving a summons to
appear at the local courthouse to testify in this murder case.
 
I questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address,
phone number at home,at work, who he worked for, how he knew the
dead guy and could he prove where he had been about one hour
before he made this call.
The telemarketer was getting very
concerned and his answers were given in a shaky voice.
 
I proceeded to tell him we had located his position at his work
place and, the police were entering the building to take him into
custody. At this point, I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of
his running away.
 
 My wife asked me as I returned to our table, why I had tears
streaming down my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for
about fifteen minutes.
My food was cold, but oh-so-very enjoyable.

14 comments:

mreddie said...

Sounds like a good revenge plan to me. How do they always when we are eating? Anymore I don't say a word more after I find out who they are, they just hear the click of my hanging up. ec

Cliff Morrow said...

I love this Peter, I might just have to try that.
The parrot story below is great too.

JunieRose2005 said...

LOL- The best ever!!

My husband will want to use this one!

June

bubba said...

Sounds good to me. Along with glad you called. I need your phone number and badge number, Or whatever identifies you at your company. Because I have asked to be put on the do not call list. Be carefull with this the sound of the other phone slamming down can hurt your ears.lol.

Karen said...

That is the best revenge on a telemarketer I've heard yet!! ROFL

When a magazine calls my dad, he asks "Does it come in brail?" and they promptly hang up and don't call again.

Have a great day!

Muzik's Mom said...

I've asked them to 'hold on' a second and then I just lay the phone down and go back to what I was doing.

Big Dave T said...

One time I did feign a foreign accent. I sounded confused as to what they were asking. Didn't take 'em long to hang up on me.

Joy Des Jardins said...

NOW THAT IS GREAT! I am in awe. Revenge is sweet....and hysterical.

Da Gal said...

I LOVE revenge or at least revengeful minds. My friend hands the phone to her 5 year old son when telemarketers call. Riley loves jerking their chains and he's so damn good at it too.

Someone once suggested keeping a whistle handy and asking the person to hold on and then blow on the whistle loudly in the phone. I like that idea!

Hale McKay said...

OMG! Now I have eyes streaming down my cheeks. Way to go, Pete. That was fantastic. I'll bet he crapped his pants too.

Hale McKay said...

PLs insert between 'have and eyes'
--"tears from my"--
(Darn keyboard Poltergeist!)

Merle said...

Peter ~~ This is hilarious but I would not be able to say it all.
Had a young chap call yesterday wanting people between 21 and 70
for some medical quizz or something. I said "Bad luck I just missed out"
Got a card & letter from Margaret
today.

Ivy the Goober said...

When I lived in Houston the newspaper there called us all the time trying to get us to subscribe. It was before "do not call lists" and they just badgered us all the time, no matter what you'd say, they'd try to convince us to take the paper. If I said, well I read it at work, they'd try to convince me to take it weekends only. One time they were insisting that my husband take the paper and after repeatedly saying NO, they asked my husband, "why not?" He said, "because I can't read!" (not true) and the guy laughed, probably thinking my husband was joking - and my husband said "you think that's FUNNY?" the guy couldn't hang up fast enough!

Craig 'n' Jen said...

this is very good, but i would never be able to remeber it all or do it with out laughing ...