"In the beginning"

Disclaimer

The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

More stuff you need to know.


I was looking for a Sunday night post, you know something quick
and easy like Sunday nights tea, (supper), and I came across this
little gem in my “blog story file.”

Hope you enjoy them.



Now here's some more "useless info' you need to know"



The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for
Blood plasma.
(I’m not gonna volunteer for this transfusion.)


No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.
(the sheet of paper I used was too thick to fold again after 7 folds.)


Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.
(I’ve always thought asses were dangerous)


You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.
(Does it double up when you sleep in front of the TV?)


Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age
or older.


The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley's gum.


The King of Hearts is the only king WITHOUT A MOUSTACHE


American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one (1) olive
from each salad served in first-class.
(How much do they save by not putting any into tourist class salads?)


Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
(Venus is normally associated with women, what does this tell you?)


Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.


Most dust particles in your house are made from DEAD SKIN!
(Just as well it's not live skin!)


The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
So did the first “Marlboro Man.


Walt Disney was afraid OF MICE!


Pearls melt in vinegar!
(Oops, I wonder who first discovered this, could be a blog there.)

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Marlboro,
Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.


It is possible to lead a cow upstairs... but, not downstairs.
(Who the hell found that out? Why did they have a cow
upstairs anyway? there’s another blog there.)


A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.


Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six
(6) feet away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from
the flush.
(I keep my toothbrush in the living room now!)


And the best for last.....


Turtles can breathe through their bums.
(I know some people like that, don't YOU?)


This bit is mine:


No I don't know anybody who can breathe thru' their bums, but I
know some people who talk thru' their bums.


And we mustn’t forget that pig;
(You remember the one that had a 30 minute orgasm.)

10 comments:

Cliff said...

I don't know if this is noteworthy, but I can exhale thru my bums.

Joy Des Jardins said...

A virtual potpourri of information Peter. Thank you so much....I'm storing it away..along with all the other "gems of wisdom" I've taken away from some of your other posts. I really enjoy these.

Anonymous said...

Peter,
Thanks for the uplifting post. Breathe thru their bums, indeed! I am still laughing. And I don't know about the size of Aussie bathrooms, but mine here in the states is smaller than 6 feet in any direction. Guess my toothbrush is going to have to find a new home probably in the bedroom. I just fear that if I move it, I won't remember the new place I put it. Life sure can be difficult.

Hale McKay said...

Funny stuf, Peter. -And educational too. _And I'm not talking from my bum.

Anonymous said...

Hi Peter
having a cuppa while reading your blog all very clear again and side bars back ty.well im not lining up for the coconut transfusion ill give that a big miss. take care

StringMan said...

Those are great, Peter. I like the comments also.

I wonder, too, about the person who discovered a cow could not go downstairs. Maybe some lonesome farmer coaxed one up the stairs so he could get a little teat ...

Merle said...

Testing

Big Dave T said...

I'd like to know how the cow got back downstairs then. Somebody have to carry him piggy-back? Did he ride a horse? Or, as I suspect, is the cow still upstairs, looking out an upstairs window, waiting to be rescued.

mreddie said...

The one about coconut milk being a substitute for plasma - I wonder how they found that out? :) ec

madameplushbottom said...

Hmmmm very very interesting. And were is that pig now? :X

great post peter. Hugs, Meg