"In the beginning"

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The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

The End Is In Sight, (for now!!)


This post is for my B**g Buddy Hoss,
who has campaigned both long and
hard against the iniquitous spread
(if you will pardon the inference)
of Butt Crack, it seems that help is
on the way Hoss.

Extracted from an article in the
Brisbane
press;


A team of underwear researchers
want to put an end to the unsightly
"builders bum" (butt crack).




A 3 year research program program, with 6000 men
measured and scanned, has come up with a revolutionary
design of underwear set to put an end to butt crack.

The Jockey 3D innovation range claims to have a unique
mix of cotton/spandex with an eight way stretch that clings
to the skin.

They are made in halves, cut on the bias and then twisted
and joined with a seam to create their “stay put” shape.

The briefs, launched in Britain and the US this week and
costing about $25 a pair will hit the Australian market
within 6 months.

Jockey Australia spokeswoman Madeleine Kelly said;
“It’s designed to move with the body so you don’t get any
twisting and bunching and things not sitting as
comfortably as they ought.”


footnote;

The new design, although most welcome, will not solve
the problem completely unless the design can also be
incorporated into work shorts, we will only swap the
unsightly butt crack for a view of builders briefs unless
this happens.


OLD FART.

A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony.

On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to
wander around.

A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately
gets an erection.

The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says,
"Did you call for me?"

The man replies, "No, what do you mean?"

She says, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule
here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me."

Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies
down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him
have his way with her.

The man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters
the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.

Within minutes a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the steam
room toward him. "Did you call for me?" says the hairy man.

"No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer.

"You must be new," says the hairy man, "it's a rule that if you
fart, it implies that you called for me."

The huge man easily spins him around, bends him over a
bench and has his way with him.


The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he
is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist.

"May I help you?" she says.

The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have
the key back and you can keep the £500 membership fee."

"But, Sir," she replies, "you've only been here for a few hours.
You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities."

The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 68 years old.
I only get an erection once a month. I fart 15 times a day."


21 comments:

Ava said...

Love the "no crack" underwear! Just Sunday afternoon we drove past a roofing project on our way to church.

Oh my gosh! I may have seen more than crack!!!

Ava

Jamie Dawn said...

I saw a funny comedy sketch for a product called Crack Spackle. It was so funny. They had it in different colors to match various skin tones. What a riot!

I hope Merle had a wonderful birthday!

Hale McKay said...

Great idea to rid the world of "butt crack."

I loved the nudist colony joke.

Hale McKay said...

Oh by the way, Peter. Congratulations on reaching the 15,000 visitors level.

Merle said...

Hi Peter ~~ A fun post. I agree with
Hoss . Bum cracks are not attractive.
Have been busy answering birthday greetings a good part of the day.Which is quite a pleasant job !!
Take care, Merle.

Merle said...

Hi again ~~ Thanks for the Ninja man.
Sorry I forgot to say it before. Bye,
Merle.

Jacqui said...

Hi Peter,
seems the strange lady has a lot of relatives.

StringMan said...

Hay Peter! So, we'll finally be ending the evils of the Butt Crack? Great! I had a good laugh at the Old Fart joke. Wonder what would've happened with a burp?

JunieRose2005 said...

Lol-

That new line of underwear sounds great!

June

Cliff Morrow said...

An underwear post. I should have anticipated that. I don't need the new kind of underwear. I can't bend over.
Hey old man, Happy early Birthday to you!!

Big Dave T said...

Wonder if that underwear keeps parts of your anatomy from "falling out." I have that problem on long wilderness hikes where I'm wearing hiking shorts.

Maria said...

Oh my, am I the only one who enjoys the butt-crack view once in awhile. Shucks.

bornfool said...

lol. I'd definitely avoid eating beans if I was staying at that nudist colony.

bubba said...

now thats funny. :)

Carolyn said...

ROFLMAO!

As for the undies, I think they'll need to lower the price so the actual men whose jobs are associated w/butt crack can afford them, lol!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Way to go, Peter. Someday, maybe we will see the Last Buttcrack In the World.

Big Dave T said...

I think my earlier comment crashed. Let's try again. I did stop by Merle's to wish her a happy birthday. You, me Merle . . . I'm beginning to think the nicest folks are born in late May. Or are Geminis. Then I get to include my wife.

Laurie said...

Hoss is going to love both parts of this post!

Meow said...

Tee hee !!!

Abandoned in Pasadena said...

Crack will be a thing of the past once this underware gets out and down to a decent price.

I felt sorry for your nudist guy. *LOL*

DellaB said...

Ha Ha Ha ! .. thanks for the laugh(s) ..