Rednecks.

Check the counter when you log in someone is gonna be
the 15,000 visitor today, it could be you.

Having spent nine years as a School Photographer I would
have gladly paid money to be there for this one.


Redneck Sexual Miss-Quotes.

A condom; is a large apartment complex.

Spread eagle; is an extinct bird.

Vagina; is a medical term used to describe a heart attack.

A menstrual cycle; has three wheels.

A G string; is part of a fiddle.

Anus; is a Latin term for yearly.

Testicles; are found on an octopus.

Asphalt; describes rectal problems.

Masturbate; is used to catch large fish.

Fetus; is a character in Gunsmoke.

An umbilical cord; is part of a parachute.

A pubic hair; is a wild rabbit.

An orgasm; is a person who accompanies a church choir.

A diaphragm; is a drawing in geometry.

An erection; is when Japanese people vote.

A lesbian; is a person from the Middle East.

Pornography; is taking pictures.

Genitals; are people of non-Jewish origin.

Paternity.

A guy goes to a supermarket and notices a beautiful blonde
wave at him and says hello, he's rather taken back, because
he can't place where he knows her from, so he says.

"Do you know me?"

To which she replies.

"I think you're the father of one of my kids.

Now he thinks back to the only time he has ever been
unfaithful to his wife and says.

"My god, are you the stripper from my bachelor party that
I laid on the pool table with, with all my buddies watching,
while your partner whipped me with wet celery and then
stuck a carrot up my butt?"

She said, "No, I'm your son's math teacher."