"In the beginning"

Disclaimer

The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Saturday, February 06, 2010

HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029

I HAD A DREAM!!!!!

Actually I had a nightmare in which I saw these headlines.



Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Little India, formerly known as Australia .
~~~~~

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Australia's third language

~~~~~
Kookaburra plague threatens northwestern Australia crops and livestock.

~~~~~~
Baby conceived naturally! ...Scientists stumped.

~~~~~~
Iran
still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

~~~~~
France
pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica ... No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

~~~~~
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

~~~~~
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

~~~~~
Australia Post raises price of stamps to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

~~~~~
85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

~~~~~
Average weight of a Australian drops to
250 lbs.

~~~~~
Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Vicindia and New South India.

~~~~~
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

~~~~~
Senate still blocking drilling in Canberra even though gas is selling for 4532 Rubies per litre and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.

~~~~~
Tasmania
executes last remaining Greenies

~~~~~
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

~~~~~
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

~~~~~
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters, and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030 as lethal weapons.

~~~~~~
Australian Tax Office sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

~~~~~
Southern Asia formerly Northern Territory voters still having trouble with voting machines.

~~~~~
Now, send this to whom ever you want and as many as you want, then, guess what....
NOTHING will happen.
No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing, except you might make someone smile
Or very very scared.

I Love This Country!
It's The Government That Scares Me!

8 comments:

Merle said...

Hi Peter ~~ Some good ones there --
but pretty scary also. I doubt our biggest threat comes from India.

I have had trouble with the quiz lately getting "no answer" when I thought I had clicked the right answer, so will have to be more watchful.

Take care, Cheers, Merle.

逛街 said...

wonderful ..................................................

karisma said...

LOL And I thought my dreams were bad!

kenju said...

Peter, those are very scary! Especially Chelsea C. as Prez!

Puss-in-Boots said...

I'm not going to be able to sleep for the next week after reading that lot...

Rachel said...

Hi Peter! Some very scary things there! That was a nightmare!!

Pamela said...

snort... hmmmmphh waaa bwaa ha ha

Janell said...

Please! No! Not Chelsea!!!