"In the beginning"


The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Curtain Rods

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes,
crates and suitcases.

On the second day, the removal firm came and collected her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
room table by candle-light, put on some soft background music,
and feasted on a pound of prawns, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of

When she had finished, she went into each and every room
and deposited a few half-eaten prawn shells dipped in caviar
into the hollow of the curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend,
all was bliss for the first few days.

Then slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out.

Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.

Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were
brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to
move out for a few days and in the end they even paid to
replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked!!!

People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house.
The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and
decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half,
they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.

Word got out and eventually even the local estate agents
refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the
bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely
and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting
the house back.

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was,
he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house
had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed and within the hour his solicitor delivered the paperwork.

A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they
watched the removal company pack everything to take to
their new home........

And to spite the ex-wife, they even took the curtain rods!!!!!!


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