Holties House: Valentines dreams

Monday, February 13, 2012

Valentines dreams

Valentines day is approaching and I dream of a beautiful lady offering me her heart.... What's that you say? "women don't have hearts"... You just need to know where to find them............Just let me dream on please

Anyone who wants a free alarm clock please contact me..... just like at Christmas time.... things were just getting interesting.... OFF WENT THAT *%##*!&** ALARM CLOCK!!!!!

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Random Thoughts

* It's a damn small mind that can only think of one way to spell a word ! ~ Andrew Jackson.

* Take my advice, I'm not using it !

* Support bacteria; It's the only culture some people have.

* Wrinkles don't hurt !

* Too soon we get old; Too late we get smart.

* If you have a dog you don't need to bark.

* Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

Albert Einstein.

* Forget the health foods, I need all the preservatives I can get.

* Depressed women eat or go shopping...Depressed men invade another country.

* Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

· What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

* Osteopornosis: A degenerate’s disease.

* "I am not young enough to know everything." ~Oscar Wilde.

* A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. A psychiatrist is the man who collects the rent. ~Jerome Lawrence.

* "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill.

* "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

* As the Buddha says, "There are two ways to have enough. One is to buy more. The other is to desire less."

* "Red meat isn't bad for you... that green fuzzy stuff is."

* Forehead.... Somewhere to rest your hand when you're frustrated.

* The seventh commandment is thou shall not admit adultery.

* Christians have only one spouse. This is called Monotony.

* "If pigs could vote, the man with the slop bucket would be elected swineherder every time, no matter how much slaughtering he did on the side." Orson Scott Card.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't botherin' you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

*The last thing I want to do is hurt you... But its still
on my list !

*Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit... Wisdom
is not putting it in a fruit salad !

* Don't argue with an idiot... He'll drag you down to
his level then beat you with experience.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier
than puttin' it back in.

Holties House

"In the beginning"

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Monday, February 13, 2012

Valentines dreams

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