"In the beginning"

Disclaimer

The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Sunday, July 09, 2006

The Perfect Post (or maybe Pest?)


Are you ever blessed with those moments of inspiration when with
perfect
clarity you see a brilliant blog post materialize before your
eyes.

A combination of things caused me to see this post bursting to life,
my post about my mate Warren, his reply in the comments section,
and comments by Raggedy and Jamie Dawn all combined to bring
about this post, brilliant or not!!!

The lead is Warren’s comment all in caps to denote that he is a
loud person, thanks Raggedy, and to give Warren the right of reply,
thanks Jamie.

********************************

ANONYMOUS SAID...

NAH, IT AIN'T TRUE WHAT PETER SAID ABOUT ME ON THE 6TH. IT'S
ALL BULLS**T AS I'M REALLY QUITE SHY AND WITHDRAWN, AND
IT'S ONLY WHEN PETER IS AROUND THAT HE BRINGS OUT THE
"DEVIL" IN ME.


JAMIE DAWN WONDERED IF THERE WERE ANY STORIES ABOUT
PETER, WAAL I CAN TELL YOU THERE'S HEAPS OF THEM ALTHO' MOST
ARE NOT WORTH REPEATING IN POLITE COMPANY, BUT HERE'S ONE
OF THEM:-

IN 2003 PETER AND I DECIDED TO DRIVE UP TO LAKE TINAROO
(JUST OUTSIDE OF ATHERTON) AS THERE WAS ALL YEAR ROUND
BARRA FISHING AT TINAROO.


WE WERE GOING TO STAY AT TINAROO FOR A WEEK. WE HAULED A
TINNIE BEHIND THE CAR (NOT THE DISCOVERY AS THIS WAS NOW
LONG GONE) AND ARRIVED TO BE GREETED BY OVERCAST RAINY
CONDITIONS.


1ST MORNING IT RAINED ALL DAY – NO FISHING.


2ND DAY OVERCAST AND SHOWERS SO WE DID THE TOURIST THING
AND DROVE AROUND LOOKING AT THE WET SIGHTS.


3RD DAY WAS OKAY SO OUT CAME THE TINNIE AND OFF WE WENT.
WE HAD BEEN TOLD THAT THE BEST SPOT FOR BARRA WAS AMONGST
THE DROWNED TIMBERLINE, SO WE POWERED THE TINNIE IN
AMONGST THE FALLEN TREES AND CAST OUT. HUM NOT A LOT OF
BITES ALTHOUGH A LOT OF FISH WERE SHOWING ON THE FISH
SOUNDER. AN HOUR OF NO BITES, SO WE UP ANCHORED AND WENT
TO ANOTHER POTENTIAL SPOT. HUM NO BITES. UP CAME THE
ANCHOR.
MUMBLE, MUMBLE.
WE HAD THE GEAR, LURES, BAIT AS RECOMMENDED BY THE BAIT
SHOP, SO WE DECIDED TO TROLL SOME LURES. NO LUCK. WE SAW
A LOT OF LAKE TINAROO, JUST NOT A LOT OF FISH!!
EUREKA FINALLY I HAD A STRIKE, AND WITH TREMBLING HANDS I
LANDED THE HUGE (NOT) BREAM. HEY IT WASN’T EVEN BIG ENOUGH
TO BE A KEEPER, ALTHO’ PETER DECIDED TO USE THE POOR (SOB)
LITTLE FELLA AS BAIT, NOT THAT THIS HELPED US AT ALL.
AFTER FIVE HOURS WE DECIDED TO GO BACK TO THE MOTEL AND
DROWN OUR SORROWS WITH A FEW ALES.


4TH DAY. GUESS WHAT IT WAS RAINING, ALTHO BY THE AFTERNOON
THE WEATHER HAD CLEARED ENOUGH FOR US TO GET BACK INTO
THE TINNIE. WE CAST, WE TROLLED, AND WE MUMBLED, WE LOOKED
AT THE FISH ON THE SOUNDER AND DECIDED THIS WAS A FAULTY
SOUNDER, GIVING US FALSE IMAGES AND FALSE HOPE. FOUR HOURS
LATER AND A FEW NIBBLES BUT NO HAULING IN, WE ADMITTED
DEFEAT AND SLUNK BACK TO THE MOTEL.
MUMBLE, MUMBLE.


5TH DAY THE RAIN ALTHO’ NOT VERY HEAVY WAS NOT ATTRACTIVE
TO GET INTO THE TINNIE SO OFF WE WENT FOR SOME MORE
TOURIST ATTRACTIONS. THE SHOWERS AND RAIN STAYED WITH US
ALL DAY.


6TH DAY MORE RAIN, SO WE DECIDED TO GO DOWN TO THE DAM
WALL TO TRY OUR LUCK WHERE PETER AND JULIE HAD PREVIOUSLY
CAUGHT SOME FISH. WE FISHED WHILE THE SHOWERS KEPT US
FROM BEING DRY AND AFTER A COUPLE OF HOURS WE DECIDED TO
TURN TO DUCK HUNTING, ELK HUNTING, CROCODILE HUNTING,
BUFFALO HUNTING, ANYTHING BUT FISH HUNTING AS WE DECIDED
WE’D PROPERLY HAVE MORE LUCK WITH THIS SORT OF SPORT.


7TH DAY AND MORE RAIN AND IT WAS TIME TO MOVE ONTO CAIRNS.
WE LATER HEARD THAT THE WEEK WE WERE THERE NOT MUCH WAS
BEING CAUGHT (DAH AS IF WE DIDN’T KNOW THAT), BUT HEY THE
NEXT WEEK THE BARRA WERE JUMPING INTO THE BOATS.
AH THE JOYS OF FISHING.

FOOTNOTE: ME AND A FRIEND WENT UP TO CAIRNS IN MARCH THIS
YEAR AND HIRED A CAR. IT WAS RAINING WHEN WE ARRIVED. THE
NEXT DAY IT WAS SHOWERING BUT WE DECIDED TO DRIVE DOWN TO
ATHERTON AND TO LAKE TINAROO. GUESS WHAT? IT WAS OVERCAST
AND RAINING.


TWO WEEKS LATER CYCLONE LARRY WIPED OUT A LOT OF INNISFAIL
AND DAMAGED SOME OF ATHERTON AND THE SURROUNDING AREAS.
NAH, I’M NOT REALLY A JINX, JUST (SOB) UNLUCKY.
MUST BE THE FOLKS I GO WITH.

HUP, TWO, THREE, FOUR, EVERYBODY IS OUT OF STEP EXCEPT ME.

*******************************

This led me to believe that I could use some other comments to
make this brilliant post a team effort, my thanks go out to the
contributors, I must state here and now though if this project isn’t
successful you are gonna get the blame, it would have worked if
your comments were funnier, if however it is the success I expect
it to be thank you all.

So I have chosen a few comments from posts over the last couple
of weeks, see if you can recall the posts they refer to.....
some bloggers will try anything to get you to reread their posts!!

Meow said...

Great jokes again, Peter. Goodness, where do you find them all ??

(Connie, as Mae West said ; “Goodness had nothing to
do with it.” )

LZ Blogger said...

Peter ~ That's NO CARTOON! I've seen cartoons. And they NEVER
looked like THAT!

Well it sure wasn’t just funny anyway Jerry.

DellaB said...

hmmm... well... I studied the cartoon for quite a long time but couldn't
see any tortises?

(Thus far you are right Della, but I’m still studying the pic!!!)

Raggedy said...

Thanks for sharing Warren with us. Hiya Warren!
It sounds like you both have a blast hanging together.
You should get him to blog. Do you think you get him to do a guest
post for you?
He could always type in all CAPS to express his loud...

You’re good idea inspired this post Raggedy, thanks.

kenju said...

It's very nice to have a good, old friend like Warren. I have a message
for him: get someone to trim your eyebrows!

Your tip was passed on Judy, Warren assures me the
trimming is done.

Jamie Dawn said...

I'm thinking the "weirdo" may have a few good tales to tell about YOU
too! I would assume that you are nutty as a fruitcake as well, in addition, also. :)

As with the comment to Raggedy, thanks Jamie, specially for
the nutty as a fruit cake bit!!!

Marcus said...

Great post Pop, funny that you didn't call him Greenie, the name by
which we (the kids) usually think of him.

Thought I was looking at Billy Connolly for a second and that as I
scrolled down was going to be confronted by a naked Greenie about to
go skinny dipping somewhere mad like the north pole.

Nah Greenie would go South for the skinny dip I’m sure.

The Heir said...

Greenie is a legend, no denying it.. but i have a photo of him kissing you
that says different about the brokeback comment.. the best bit was how
you both went looking for the other ones favorite treats and offered
them round to everybody in the house!!

One should be able to expect some respect from their
Grandsons Zac, now I’m gonna
have to go to a lot of trouble
explaining, thanks!!

Jacqui said...

Hi Peter, really loved the Kiwi story, I LOL at that one.
Great story
Warren, no you are not the jinx, it's just the company
you keep. cheers jacqui

I’m pretty sure Warrens cousin Ros is gonna be upset by
that comment Jacqui.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Do they poop when they pop? This could get very messy.

It’s all good dung beetle fodder Hoss.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Well, the Europeans are certainly not going to let any outlanders score,
you know.
Poor
Brazil.

Very prophetic words Hoss, the World Cup did indeed end
up all European.

JunieRose2005 said...

Yep, obsessed! :)

I’m glad you put that little smiley in there June.

Miss Cellania said...

No need to apologize. Being obsessed with breasts puts you in a very
large pool. Like half the population.

Far more than half Miss C.

Dorothy said...

LOLOLOL, YOU ARE ONE INSANE PERSON, YOU KNOW THAT,
PETER????? ;o)

This comment hurt, it was from a reader I had never heard
from before, to be
judged so harshly on one post was unfair!!!

Miss Cellania said...

I thought I had hit the wrong button coming here.. thanks for the compliments
(blush blush). The mustache was per my request to Frontier Editor.

I’m not gonna ask why you would want a pic with a mustache adorning that lovely face Miss C…. Like hell I’m not WHY???

Ms. Vickie said...

All I'm saying is there is something to that Aussie
male accent that makes this Southern Americian Lady's
heart go pitty patter.

G’day Mate howya goin’? chuck another shrimp on the
Barbie cobber.

Cliff Morrow said...

My bride and I were in the car tonight and I couldn't understand the
first letter of the word. Was it F or S? I said, " Are you saying S as in
Sex?" She replied, "No I'm saying S as in maybe Someday."

We all have our problems Cliff, but Marilyn is a fair
lady I’m sure.

Jamie Dawn said...

I am NOT hitonious!!! Hitonious is worse than hideous and
horrendous combined.

Peter said...

A most humble retraction is herby offered to Jamie Dawn, this arose
out of a mis-understanding of the word Hitonious, which I believed to
be defined be "Hillarious and Riotous" 'K Jamie?

Maria said...

Loyal Friend! Hey isn't that what they say about Collies like good
old Lassie?

Bowsie Wowsie Maria, I must practice them smiley things
so I stop offending people.

jules said...

Still a little scary, if you ask me.

Nah Jules, 320 pound women are friendly.

Jamie Dawn said...

I don't know what the words chooks, emus, and dunny mean, so I don't
know if I just wrote down some naughty things or not.

Jamie you would never say anything naughty, Chooks are
chickens, Emus are big
birds like ostrich’s, and Dunny’s are
toilets/bathrooms/loo’s etc. they are often
the outside
variety when referred to as dunny’s.

Hale McKay said...

Darn it, Peter! I've spent all this time trying to forget what/who Hootie
and theBlowfish were.

You’ll have to do a post so we all know Mike.

JunieRose2005 said...

Oh, MY!

But don't we all admire a wife who is always so willing to help out in
times of trouble? :)

Now getting those 62 votes was going far beyond her duty to help
out in needy times! :)

Yep 62 votes was a lot of wifely effort June.

StringMan said...

Your triplet joke only proves you need further therapy, Holtie!

Now there’s another hurtful comment String, just when I
felt I was getting’ on top
of my problem!!!

Maria said...

In my mind I see Depravity Lane as a rather dark street with lots of
neon lights, music, and the smell of beer. The kind of place I like to go
once in awhile when the family isn't looking. So don't stop Dr.J cuz I
plan to meet him in
Depravity Lane next full moon or wait! Is that the
wolfman that comes to life in the full moon? Doesn't matter I love all
the depraved characters. Bring em on!

Maria, I have always felt that you were a free spirit Babe.

Karen said...

What butt crack? All I saw was a ceiling fan ;-) LOL

It must be something in our genes (or jeans) Karen, that
dictates just what we see
under certain circumstances!!!

Carolyn said...

That last joke was a riot! As for the frog- well, now I'll never be able to
kiss a frogever again!

That must be tough Carolyn, and for any other regular
frog kissers too.

******************************************

Oh, by the way re the Zac, (alias Skirt Boy) comment, I post evidence that this
was unsolicited attention from Warren (alias Weirdo), and these pictures while
substantiating the fact also record the reaction.

This collage that Marcus has already posted at holtpress is the
only photographic evidence of the INCEDENT.


There is however much photographic evidence of the reaction.

This is Zac (Skirt Boy) the culprit in the "lets dob in a grandpa" case




10 comments:

The Heir said...

Am I allowed a rebuttal as well?? coz thats not a nice thing to say really... and its a kilt!!

kenju said...

Peter, this is a good idea for a post - very funny. Tell your friend I am glad SOME men listen to me...LOL. Mr. kenju's eyebrow trimmings could make a wig for someone bald, I think...LOL again.

Warren Green said...

'Tis Warren here:-
Okay enough picking on me (whimper) as I can do this all by myself without any help. Kenju talking about eyebrow trimmings making a good wig for someone bald....have you have a good look at Peter's picture lately...hum!!
Jacqui we all know who the real jinx is and it ain't Ros. Some company just won't stay away...they just keep coming back.
Nah, Dorothy you might be new to Peter's blog but you got it right in one read. Amazing how one can read the correct nature of a person from their blog. Woo!Woo!Woo! I'm Daffy (Peter) Duck.
Marcus re the skinny dipping bit...can you remember a certain picture of a certain person with the name starting with P and finishing with R. It was taken at the Pinnacles and was included in the 70th Birthday book.
I understand there are a number of people who are still in therapy after having seen this scary photo...eeech!!
Thanks Zac I wasn't "kissing" Peter I was trying to strangle him... it was just a friendly birthday (choke) gift.
'Twas nice of Holtie giving me my 15 seconds of fame and spreading me all around blog's world.
The e-mails haven't stopped with offers of me to star in the next production of The Three Stooges.
Nuk...nuk...nuk!!!
That's all folks.

Jacqui said...

Excellent post, enjoyed the photos of your discomfort as well.

Big Dave T said...

That was a great fish story. My father is a big fisherman and it sounded like a fisherman's tale of woe he might tell.

JunieRose said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!

Fun-fun-fun!!

( that kiss looks pretty much real to me...from what I remember of such things...)

JunieRose

Jamie Dawn said...

Warren: You managed to drone on and on about day after day of rain and NO fish, well except for that teeny one. After what Peter said about you, I'm wondering why you didn't bring some dynamite and blast those fishies to kingdom come! Crazy guys like you, fish with dynamite.

Peter, just to let you know, I'm still NOT at ALL hitonious! Warren may be hitonious, but NOT ME!!!

Raggedy said...

Jamie is not hitonious. Great pictures.
Have a wonderful day!
*^_^
(=':'=) meow hugs
(")_ (")Š from da Raggedy one

The Heir said...

I'm working on the sporan thing, scotland is a mere 5 hours away and ive been looking for an excuse to go up there...
btw:care to translate ur comment on the holtpress into something nearer to logical english??

Marcus said...

Looks like The Heir pushed a button THERE Pop! Revenge is a dish best served cold they say!

Got me on a typo!

Kilt Boy is a great name.

I was there and it looked distinctly like a kiss to me!