"In the beginning"

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The views expressed in this blog are not necessarily the views of the blog management, (on the other hand, they are not necessarily not the views of the blog management).

No effort has been made to stay within the bounds of the truth in this blog as it has always been the view of the management that the truth should never be allowed to stand in the way of a good story.

Friday, November 24, 2006

Life is all about asses.


I hope its not only me who can see the Grand Wizard instructing
the evil black knights in the gentle art of sorcery?




A tale of a donkey.


An old man, a boy & a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on the
donkey & the old man walked. As they went along they passed some
people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking & the
boy was riding.

The man & boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed
positions.

Later, they passed some people that remarked, "What a shame, he
makes that little boy walk."

They then decided they both would walk! Soon they passed some
more people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a
decent donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.

Now they passed some people that shamed them by saying how
awful to put such a load on a poor donkey.

The boy & man said they were probably right, so they decide to
carry the donkey. As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip
on the animal & he fell into the river and drowned.

The moral of the story?


If you try to please everyone, you might as well...

Kiss your ass goodbye!


Life is all about asses.
you're either covering it,
laughing it off,
kicking it,
kissing it,
busting it,
trying to get a piece of it,
or behaving like one.





First time sex.

A couple were sitting up waiting for their 16 year old son to come
home from a social engagement when the boy came into the house
with a big smile on his face.

"Hi, Mum! Hi, Dad! he said breathlessly. "Guess what! I've just had
sex for the first time, and it was wonderful!"

His mother turned red and said to her husband, "He's your son. You
talk to him".

Then she left the room.

The father said "Son, that's great. Now you've become a man and I'm
proud of you. I'm going to celebrate the occasion by buying you that
ten-speed bike you've been wanting. I hope you don't mind waiting
till payday to get it".

"That's OK, Dad", said the boy.

"I couldn't ride it right now anyway, my ass is too sore".


I think that has covered the topic of asses pretty well.




Hollywood
is a place where

they'll pay you a thousand dollars

for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.











12 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love the photo. Great shot.

Merle said...

Hi Peter ~ I liked the donkey story.
Sure can't please everybody and it was difficult for the old man and boy to please anybody. Take care, Merle.

Jeanette said...

Hi Peter trying to catch up again .
Great photo
I also liked the donkey story
You will never please everybody .It would be a strange world if we did.
First time sex hahaha.

Cliff said...

Great pic, story, and jokes, Good ones AGAIN... keep er up Buddy!!

jules said...

Ah Petey Baby, you're coming over to the Dark Side...I love it.

Katherine said...

That first picture was amazing - way too cool! I don't know if I would have seen the sorcerer and the knights, but since you mentioned it, I can. The donkey story was quite funny!

Anonymous said...

Of course you always make me laugh.. those were great.. I'm such a bad lucy -- i've not been visiting anyone lately. Good thing the new year is coming so i can officially make some resolutions to fix that.

Merle said...

Hi Peter ~ I hope you didn't have money on that bet, because we DID go the High road, but didn't come home that was. (As we did) John did the same trip on his bike a few weeks ago He is back in Wangaratta today picking up toys for Christmas for his Ulysses club. I was so glad to see Bill there, his tests OK, just has to have 3 mthly blood test to check the cancer. Lorraine & Ernie , Bob & Margaret R. were there too. So we sat together at the Country Club after funeral.
Take care, Merle.

Christina said...

Terrific picture!!! I can definitely see the wizard and the knights - it looks very mystical and a little scary, but in a good way.

Lee said...

From boobs to asses, Peter...dare we guess what comes next?

Fun jokes! :)

Granny said...

I've told that donkey story for years. Thanks for the reminder that I can't please everyone.

Granny said...

Is that George Jones?